Photo by Phil Roeder, Wikimedia Commons.
I’ve perused the Twitter timeline of an apparent white knight. He is a male feminist “ally” who is confused by #WomenAgainstFeminism:
How, as a woman, can you be against achieving equal political, economic, cultural, personal, and social rights for women? Dear God.
— David McQueen ♕ (@DavidMcQueen) September 13, 2015
There are many different reasons why some women oppose feminism. I won’t try to speak for them. But I want to explain my reasons, and speak only for myself.
Hammers Are Not Screwdrivers
I don’t want “equality.” The reason is that men and women are not equal. We are biologically different and we are suited to complementary roles.
A hammer is not better than a screwdriver and a screwdriver is not better than a hammer.
A hammer can’t do everything a screwdriver can do, only better.
Spending fifty years pretending screwdrivers are the best and the best hammer is one that can best imitate a screwdriver is absurd.
I don’t want equal rights AND responsibilities. Why do feminists leave out half the equation?
I don’t want an equal right and responsibility to serve in combat. Or to be a police officer or a firefighter. If a woman wants those roles and she can meet the existing standards, bully for her. If she can really do equal work, let her have equal pay. But the truth is most women are not suited to those roles, and most women don’t want them.
A Hint of Reality
I watched a movie the other day and it suddenly dawned on me it didn’t fit with feminist dogma. In Hollywood movies these days, gender really is just a social construct. A scrawny little woman can whip six brawny men without breaking a sweat. Why not? It’s just a film, and with enough feminist social engineering, maybe the public can be duped into believing women really are just as strong as men.
But in the movie I watched recently, a man was running the show, manipulating pretty much everyone. Another man came on the phone with him, and he wasn’t a falling for the ruse. The most competent, intelligent people in this movie were men. How did the SJWs let that happen? Hmm…
The movie (spoiler alert: this one) is based on a true story. Surprise! In real life, men and women are still different.
The Problem of Equality
If men and women are actually different, then they can’t be equal. We can start by merely conceding, grudgingly, that men and women are not the same, but should nevertheless be equal, and that sounds just fine. But in practical terms, it doesn’t work for the reason I mentioned earlier. A hammer will never be a screwdriver.
Feminists recognized this problem, even in the 1960s. So they asserted there really is no hammer, and there is no screwdriver. No men and no women. Gender, they said, was just a social construct. And with that we can all be anything we want, tossing reality out the window.
Except reality has a way of reasserting itself and the FACT we are men and women is a biological reality that will not be denied.
Once you acknowledge we are fundamentally different, in practical terms, you must acknowledge we are fundamentally unequal, at least in certain respects. We can argue that hammer and a screwdriver are “equal” in that they both are vital tools. You can’t have a functioning toolbox unless you have both.
But they are not equally suited to drive a nail or turn a screw. You can dismiss that gap as a “social construct” or a figment of our imagination. No matter how delusional the observer, the reality remains unchanged.
I don’t agree with feminism because I don’t want to be an imitation man. I don’t want to compete with men in traditionally male space. What now passes for feminism in my view should be called masculism, because modern-day “feminism” devalues femininity and concedes to coveted masculinity as the highest ideal. To me, real “feminism” is insisting that women be respected and cherished as women, in their own right. That “women’s work” would be viewed as equally vital as compared to “men’s work,” and “women’s qualities” such as nurturing and empathy, would be fully appreciated. Men would be appreciated and respected as men.
Love and Mutual Respect
I want a partner. Not a rival.
Unlike feminists, I recognize that not everyone wants the very same. I would support people in their efforts toward less rigid gender roles. I believe we should make space for people who don’t fit into the prevailing social order, whatever it may be. But I don’t agree that denying the differences between men and women, and overturning every aspect of the social order that’s in harmony with our nature, is a worthy goal.
Society depends on raising children to be healthy, productive adults. We are failing at that task. I don’t need a poll or a set of statistics. The evidence is all around. Feral children. They’re everywhere. Often in my dining room, or strewn across my floor. Other people’s children, who fell through the cracks. The afterthoughts the feminists consigned to the margins of their plans.
I don’t accept the counsel of such luminaries as Andrea Dworkin and (disgusting sexual predator) Simone de Beauvoir, any more than the feminists of today. I don’t consider being a cog in the capitalist machine more glorious, praiseworthy and worthwhile than being a wife and mother. I don’t think the highest achievement for a woman is to be a man.
Yes, I understand that feminism isn’t just one thing. I know not all feminists are third wave radicals. But feminists themselves insist feminism is about “equality” and I believe them. I don’t want equality. I want inequality. The inequality that stems from recognizing reality. From believing without a doubt that there really are hammers and screwdrivers, and they can never be the same.
I’m not stupid or brainwashed. Nor am I a misogynist who’s too dumb to realize I’m really a self-hating woman. The condescending “explanations” consistently trotted out by feminists remind me of the worst elements of traditional male chauvinism. I suppose that makes sense since feminists have done their best to be imitation men.
I want justice. For men, women, and children. Men and women to live in harmony, within a context of mutual respect. Families and children, our future, to be a bigger priority than female narcissism and grievance manufacturing.
I want people to appreciate BOTH (not “all”) genders, and to restore the natural dynamic feminists destroyed.